Sunday, January 8, 2012

Trends I Don't Understand

So I posted the other day about my new found love for Bones. As one can tell, I'm not up to date with trends. Having a three year old combined with no TV besides Hulu Plus, means I'm a bit behind. I mean, I know there is this thing called the internet and tons of websites that could keep me up to date but I'd rather spend my time on Pinterest to be blunt.

That being said, I don't understand some of the trends I hear about. Some of these trends I'm sure are even old trends, perhaps ones that are on their way out and even better trends are already here. But that aside, I don't understand the following ones still...

Harry Potter. This isn't to say I don't have a vague idea of what it's all about. Wizards. Magic. Some kid with a scar. A red head. A girl who grew into herself (way to go you). I just don't get any references anyone makes, ever. I also can't seem to get past more than 10 minutes of any of the movies before feeling all twitchy and getting up to organize something. This isn't saying I think it's stupid, I'm just saying I just feel like I missed this boat. After all, I was busy reading Vittio the Vampire by Anne Rice when these books first came out.

Which brings me to my next trend, Twighlight. Once again, I get the idea. Vampires. Sparkles. A wolf? After that I become hazzy on the details. I'm told that the books are much better than the movies. It's not that I'm not into vampires, I like Anne Rice after all. But I've been told that is my problem. I started with Anne Rice and have a firm and unwavering opinion now on what vampires should be able to do... and sparkle isn't one of them.

The next trend though I can't even pretend I get it. Mustaches. They are on like freaking everything and I don't get why. I feel like this is one of those trends that started like a crush in middle school. You know the kind, where Suzy hears that Johnny likes her and knowing that Johnny is the coolest guy ever figures, why not like him too, because surely he must be onto something, being popular and all. I feel it's like that, but with mustaches. Someone heard someone else really loved mustaches, and that first someone always seems hip and cool, so now everyone likes mustaches. It's not that I hate mustaches, if someone wants to rock a Ron Burgundy stache, then rock on.

Which leads into the next trend, Hipsters. I feel like the whole other side of the office, all the newbies they just hired, fit this category, at least from outward appearance sake. They all by the way have the unofficial nick name as a group in the office as The Junior Adventure Team. There may also be occasional Scooby Doo references, because at my office, we are very mature like that. Anywho, they almost all have glasses, know all these underground awesome places, are super passionate about everything and look at me like I'm lame. I feel like walking past a group of them is like being back in high school and I'm still that awkward fat girl wearing all black and a bat necklace whose just trying to get past the football players to get to gym class. Only now I'm fat and wearing slacks and just trying to make some damn coffee so I can sound like a reasonable adult while trying to reason with my clients.

Talking about masses, lets talk about Zombies next. The Husband is all about the zombies. He loves games with them like Dead Island, shows with them like The Walking Dead and even has books about them, The Zombie Survival Guide being one of his favorites. I just don't want to get this trend. It makes me queasy when I think about them and twitchy when I hear them frankly and if this trend could die, I'd be happy. I'd pretty much rather hear anything other than the horrible sounds zombies make on TV. That being said, if an outbreak did occur, I feel confident The Husband has our zombie survival plan already in place. Seriously, ask him, he will go into detail. He has put in as much time on our survival plan as I did contemplating what color to paint the living room.

Talking about horrible sounds, the final trend I don't understand is any show on TV that has singing in it. Shows like Glee and American Idol make me physically uncomfortable. I don't know why, perhaps I have some unknown traumatic incident from an elementary school play I'm repressing, but either way, these shows makes me feel uncomfortable and I can say honestly, I don't like shows that have pointless music or musicals. Unless Disney princesses or Seth McFarlen are involved. Then I love it. Love it.

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